In a bid to reduce the growing problem of the mis-selling of religion, the government has announced it is to set up a new regulatory body, OfGod. The new organisation will have powers to fine any religious organisation that breaches it’s code of conduct and covers places of worships, stalls in the high street and door-to-door religion sellers.
‘When looking into the problem we realised customer are being ripped off by these organisations’ the head of OfGod, Gordon Devilin explained. ‘Complaints range from pushy salesman through to unfair terms and conditions that are not highlighted when signing up.’
One customer, Mrs Brownlow, told us she was ‘disappointed’ to find out the trip to Heaven she was promised on the advert for the Church of England was not quite as promised. ‘The poster claimed I could have an all expenses paid trip to paradise if I signed up. Only after doing the deal did they mention the fact I had to die first. As there was no ‘cooling off period’ the only option way I thought I could claim the trip was suicide, but apparently even that would invalidate the offer. It seems like a bt of a con really.’
After realising that she may have made a mistake, Mrs Brownlow started to shop around and found that in some religions suicide could lead you to Paradise if you took some ‘infidels’ with you. But this is where she came across the second biggest complaint about religious organisations, switching.
‘Switching between providers needs to be made easier with paperwork being dealt with by the organisations on behalf of the customer’ a spokesman for CompareTheDeity.com told us. For example, if you have the certificate to say you have been confirmed as a Catholic, then this should be accepted if you choose to go with Judaism. This should then entitled you to a cut-price Bris at a snip of the full price.’
The last area of responsibility for OfGod will be the regulation of door-to-door religion sellers. ‘Many people are finding it increasingly difficult to get rid of these persistent salesman from their front door’ Mr Devilin told us. ‘They will not take no for an answer and seem to ignore the sticker on people’s property stating ‘we do not buy or sell religion at this door’. However some communities have already been proactive in wiping out the problem. One neighbourhood we know of has taken to using snipers that are positioned in a somewhat ironic watchtower.’