As the BA cabin crew strike becomes increasingly bitter, international aid agencies have been put on alert by Unite Union’s claims that the company is trying to starve their members back to work. One picket line had to close early yesterday after the First Class canapés ran out by lunchtime. ‘It was shocking to see senior staff with over twenty years loyal service being forced to eat World Traveller beef-or-chicken’ said one striker, who cannot be named for fear of being given a wedgie by thuggish BA managers.
Another colleague said ‘Yeah, that’s right. Do they expect us to eat that disgusting muck the Socialist Workers Party keep bringing us. The drink situation is almost as bad as well. Some of us are down to our last bottle of Pimms, the litre bottles of duty-free are all empty and there are only a handful of whisky miniatures left.’
The response of the major aid agencies is still awaited, but in a recorded message to a mass weekend rally of almost two dozen strikers Sir Bob Geldof said ‘The world feels your pain. I will never forget the heart-rending images of mothers and children with bloated stomachs fighting over the last few spoonfuls of tiramisu and smiling bravely as they headed back to the bouncy castle. I only wish I could have been there, but my effin’ flight was cancelled.’