Britain to be matt-finished by 2035
PM Sir Keir Starmer has reiterated his commitment to have nothing shiny left in Britain within the next decade. In a statement today the...
US billionaires to FINALLY get a break
America’s most oppressed minority – billionaires – have expressed relief that the current Commie hellscape is drawing to a close. ‘You...
Burglary victim told to be reasonable about it
A burglary victim was today told by the police to be more reasonable in his demands for the return of his property. Mr Zelensky of Europe...
AI president to be switched off
AI generated president Joe Biden will be switched off for good in January 2025
Geonocide candidate confused why voters didn't back her
Geonocide candidate confused why voters didn't back her The chattering classes were left shell-shocked that some people were not keen on...
That Trump acceptance speech in full
'Friends, criminals, countrymen. You gave me your votes as I knew you would. Thank you. I will make sure that Elon pays out. It was...
USA accidentally elects Camilla president
A typo on millions of ballot papers has seen the USA accidentally become an absolute monarchy again, under President Queen Camilla. "We...
Badenoch and Man Utd manager in race to get sacked first
Fans are not optimistic about the longevity of either appointment, given how shambolic their teams are and their insistence that the only...
Analysts speculate on possible medical reasons why Putin scratched his ear
There was puzzlement yesterday over the Russian leader’s bizarre motion during a press conference held, ostensibly, for non-health...
Guardian decides identity politics not such a good idea after all
The election of Kemi Badenoch as Tory leader has led leftwing firebrand newspaper the Guardian to conclude that maybe identity politics...
