A proposed ban on assault rifles has catapulted the weapons to the top of Americans' present lists this festive season. More families than ever across all 50 States are expected to unwrap the guns with unbridled joy and glee on Christmas Day while they still have the chance, (thoughtful gift givers will have remembered the bullets so the fun can begin even before breakfast). For those families who prefer to open presents on Christmas Eve, shooting ranges have promised to stay open late, which is just as well since all the schools are closed.
Making a refreshing change from bath robes and towels, (but outside the budgets of most couples) are rhinestone-encrusted, gold-plated 'his and hers' assault rifle sets.
"Guns make perfect Christmas gifts. Had Joseph and Mary been given a set of these instead of some dumb fragrances, there's no way they'd have had to run and hide from Herod's mob," commented an NRA spokesman.