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NB's Virtual Christmas Party !!!

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Started 6 months ago by Sinnick
Latest reply from Ironduke

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Sinnick

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Ok, everyone else is having a jolly party nowadays (Clegg excepted), so maybe we should too. Don't know why it's not been thought of before. Anyone and everyone invited, just the obvious rule that you must bring something along (yes, even Jesse Bigg). Feel free to engage in small talk and inappropriate liasions, but please leave the fighting until later. If it's a success, it might get resurrected next year.

I've brought along an Aldi superpack of sausage rolls. They weren't touched last year, so they'll still be Ok if you brush off the green bits. Being ever so generous, I've got 5 litres of home-brewed barley wine, made by mixing barley with Lambrini. Not tasted it yet, but I've got hopes.

[edit: this is a VIRTUAL party, where even CC deniers are welcome]

Posted 6 months ago #
waylandsmithy

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I think it's traditionally held in London on a school night, so us cunts from outside the M25 have no hope of making it.

We could have a rival one on my windy, Cheshire hill. Got a barrel of maple syrup xxb in the garage, and a ham. What more could you want? Tantalising conversation? Bollocks.

Posted 6 months ago #
Stan Laurel

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Wayland, I thought the idea of a virtual party was that everyone could attend. I'm going anyway. I've been saving a Watney's Party 7 for just such an occasion.

Posted 6 months ago #
Idiot

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You'll find me in the kitchen, as always.

Posted 6 months ago #
Sinnick

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Welcome Stan, that'll be vintage '72 I guess. A good year. Brings back fond memories of leaning over a stranger's hedge, that does, and a draughty night in Her Majesty's Pleasure. Sorry, should that read "at" ?

Idiot, haven't you brought anything ? No food, no drink, not even a whimsical story about some sexual encounter best forgotten ?

Posted 6 months ago #
writinginbsl

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i found a 2/3 empty (1/3 full) bottle of flat coke behind the washing machine. i'll bring that

Posted 6 months ago #
dvo4fun

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Mateus Rose anyone? The student's choice for a 1970s party 'entrance-fee'. Not for actually drinking by the bringer, you understand. Just used to gain entry to the venue and then GET STUCK INTO MY BLOODY BOTTLE OF SPIRITS!! Marxist Ponce.

Aah, I feel better now

Posted 6 months ago #
Midfield Diamond

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I'll bring my hatred of drinking lager (especially straight out of cans), my biting criticism of any music that happens to be playing, my absolute refusal to dance with anyone and my cynicism about Christmas parties. Life and soul, that's me. Now, where's that bloody bottle of Blue Nun I've donated and won back at each of the last three raffles in aid of the church roof?

Posted 6 months ago #
Perks

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Fantastic. At last I have a use for my vintage 1993 bottle of strawberry MD 20/20.

Posted 6 months ago #
The All New Jeni B

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Please accept this 1/2 a Babycham four pack.

I can bring tiredness, stress, and a complete lack of interest in small-talk with me.

Posted 6 months ago #
bonjonelson

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I heard Mike Tyson is coming

Posted 6 months ago #
beau-jolly

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Well unless people realise its bastard well Christmas and start bastard well shopping VERY soon there is an excellent chance I will be bringing gallons of vintage Port, thousands of pounds worth of claret, a metric shitload of white Burgundy, at least half a dozen boxes of hand-rolled cigars and a few crates of "Smokey Bastard" Porter.

Posted 6 months ago #
Idiot

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Actually, I thought about bringing some mulled wine but I was in Ponders End at the time and kind of stopped thinking about it. Sorry.

Posted 6 months ago #
Not Amused

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I'll pop in for a while and bring the last bottle of my prune and strepsil wine.

Posted 6 months ago #
Sinnick

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I think you mean Michelle Tyson. The African papers got it right, and the European papers were conned by this spoof that he denied it. Strange old world.

Not many of the sausage rolls left, though some of them seem to have flecks of ...

Surely someone has some party food ? Something that goes down well and doesn't come back up ?

And is that ASBO in the corner ? Haven't seen him since well before the trouble.

Posted 6 months ago #
Squudge

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OK I'll bring a cheeze and tinned-pineapple hedgehog (with babybels for eyes - I've made an effort dammit). I have a bottle of white wine that has gone a bit fizzy too.

Where can I park? I bloody hate London parking me.

I plan to get tiddly and snog someone inappropriate. Get in line.

Posted 6 months ago #
waylandsmithy

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I'll bring rohypnol and an industrial piercing gun. Unwanted facial studs can be really funny.

Posted 6 months ago #
Squudge

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Wayland - where had you thought of holding the out-of-town alternate shindig?

Posted 6 months ago #
Tripod

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I heard Mike Tyson is coming

That'll be quite a racket, I imagine. I hope it's something I'll never hear...

Posted 6 months ago #
Vertically Challenged Giant

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I've got some cocktail sticks. If somebody else can bring some bite-size food I'll happily jab it with a pointy stick and then eat it.

Posted 6 months ago #
Sinnick

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Squudge, you don't need parking here. You're talking to a computer.

And there's always Michelle Tyson for snogging. Keep it quiet under the pile of coats will you, she doesn't want a recurrence of that "incident".

Posted 6 months ago #
Vertically Challenged Giant

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Squudge - the out of town shindig is in Somalia this year. Or Burton on Trent, but Somalia might be nicer.

Posted 6 months ago #
waylandsmithy

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A Burton do does sound tempting...although now might be about the right time to organise something for Easter?

Posted 6 months ago #
Mandy Lifeboat

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Burton for an Easter meet up would get my vote - how about The Dragon at Willington. Oh and I've put some mixed herbs in a rizla to pass around.

Posted 6 months ago #
waylandsmithy

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Do they do ale?

Posted 6 months ago #
Gerontius

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http://www.flickr.com/photos/kdphotos/5824095224/

This is Jenny and Quaz underneath the mistletoe at last years office party.
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-WFS3_IW1ZQM/UFcZdMWmPHI/AAAAAAAAG2Q/SOAJzjHMF84/s1600/resize.jpg

Stan brought his squeeze-box along
http://www.real-cider.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/The_Wurzels_2647.jpg

Posted 6 months ago #
Mandy Lifeboat

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Wayland - don't know much about ale (is that a brand of lager?) what with me being a girl and all that, but i found this on t'internet. I believe the local derby and burton beers (they tend to have a couple on as wellas the doom bars of this world) are worth a punt. I reckon you could do it in a couple of days of days from your place by canalboat.

http://www.thedragonatwillington.co.uk/beers_59_7.html

Posted 6 months ago #
beau-jolly

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Proper pub

Posted 6 months ago #
The All New Jeni B

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My Mum's maiden-name was Bennett, do I get family discount?

Posted 6 months ago #
Sinnick

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Well, it's been going for 24 hours now, and it's beginning to liven up. Stan's squeeze box has been a welcome interlude from my K-Tel vinyl played continuously. If no-one brings along any more music, I'll put on my "Best of Cliff" album. I mean it.

Drinks have all but run out. Anyone got any home-distilled vodka? My brother once made some from potato peel and raisins, but found it worked better in diesel engines than as a drink (true story).

Only another 9 days, then we'll all have to go to our own homes.

Posted 6 months ago #

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