Not to be outdone by tennis player Novak Djokavic's acquisition of all Donkey Cheese produced over the next year, a consortium of Premier League footballers have entered into a similar investment. The multi-million pound deal sees all Unicorn Cheese produced belong to them.
As spokesman for the group Wayne Rooney explains, the deal has been facilitated by a Nigerian prince with whom he has had previous dealings. "The Prince approached me and some other players to see if we wanted to invest more money whilst we wait for the return on his assets being released from Nigeria. Unicorn cheese is very rare so we would have been stupid not join up."
The Prince, who was only contactable by Email, seemed less enthusiastic to talk to us however he did say that the price for Unicorn cheese was high. When we asked asked if you could sell the cheese for more than £1000 a kilo, he confirmed by saying 'yeah, if you like.'
The consortium of footballers are now preparing to visit the Unicorn farm where the cheese will be produced. Clark Carlisle, player spokesman for the PFA, and seen by the others as the intellectual one, said he is organising the trip, but admitted it was difficult finding flights to Nania. "We are trying to go with BA but if that's not possible, the Nigerian Prince has contacts in Lapland and says there will be a fleet of reindeer and a sleigh for hire in January. I have sent him a deposit on behalf of the group just in case."
Concerns have been raised about the legitimacy of the deal, but Wayne Rooney puts that down to jealousy. "People will always try and stop you making money. People said I was mad to invest in a real life dinosaur theme park, but I was shown a DVD yesterday and it looks like my 'Jurassic Park' is nearly complete".