An interior decorator employed by a man known only as “The Doctor” is starting a legal case against him after his initial assessment of the job ended up taking far longer than he had been led to believe.
“He turned up in this blue box and asked how much I would charge to paint the skirting boards and wallpaper it. I took a quick look at the outside, and quoted him for half a day. Once I turned up and went inside, it was much bigger, with multiple rooms. The swimming pool cum library alone was a nightmare job, we had to get in scaffolding.” complained the contractor. “I ended up spending six months on the job, although he did drop me off half a day after I started, so I didn’t lose any work and the missus didn’t wonder where I’d been.”
The Doctor has been taken to court under charges breaches of contractual law and false imprisonment. “Don’t get me wrong” said Dave Brown, the Plaintiff. “He always knocked up a decent fried breakfast in the morning, but it was strictly no smoking onboard and since he was frequently in the Time Vortex or in Outer Space, it made nipping out for a roll-up a bit tricky. I popped out for a rolly in 1066 and almost got burnt as a Witch. He’s a diamond geezer, but he never mentioned that we might almost have our brains chopped out by Cybermen. That’s basic risk assessment “.
“I was able to cut a few corners in the Cloister room, because it’s mostly stonework, but the dressing room was a pain because I had to shift of all his outfits to a bedroom before I could put the sheets down and start.” said Dave. “I spent an entire day doing one bedroom, then his assistant got trapped in a parallel universe and he deleted the room. I was gutted!”.
Dave maintains that he is willing to settle out of court for “That planet made of diamond”, while the legal system on Earth keeps him in a secure unit and pumps him full of drugs.