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Quick links: NewsBiscuit Home • Chat Room • Writers' Room • Top Ten

1. 

   Stan Laurel
   

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   Picking up from Smart Alex's Film Sequels, can I suggest similar for festive songs? To start the ball rolling:

   Next Christmas

   I saw Mommy shagging Santa Claus

   Away with the Magners

   Santa Toddler

   Posted 5 months ago #
2. 

   Oxbridge
   

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   Bloody Hell, it IS Christmas Every Day

   Santa Claus Has Come to Town, Got Pissed and Fucked Off Home Again

   O Quite Large Tourist Trap of Bethlehem

   Hark The Herald Angels Sing Out of Tune

   While Shepherds Watched TV By Night

   Merry Christmas (War is Over, But Give it Five Minutes...)

   Posted 5 months ago #
3. 

   Mr Target
   

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   Silent Night II

   Posted 5 months ago #
4. 

   FlashArry
   

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   The Holly and the V

   Posted 5 months ago #
5. 

   pinxit
   

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   'Mistletoe & Just The One Unit Of Wine' (by The BMA Massive)

   Posted 5 months ago #
6. 

   seymour totti
   

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   Brilliant Flash! Never too early in the day for a Roman Numerals based joke.

   Christmas Time (Please tells the Bells to shut up now)
   Mistletoe & Rehab
   I Saw Three Ships (being boarded by Somali Pirates)
   Big Donkey
   Mary's Boy Teenager
   Winter Wonderbra

   Posted 5 months ago #
7. 

   godly1966
   

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   little bummer boy

   Posted 5 months ago #
8. 

   Dick Everyman
   

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   Oh Brittle Town of Bethlehem

   Posted 5 months ago #
9. 

   sigmund
   

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   It’ll be lonely next Christmas.
   Last Christmas I gave you my heart, (even though I didn’t have a ‘kin donor card).
   Hark, the Hell’s Angels sing.
   Start the Cavalry.

   Posted 5 months ago #
10. 

    riesler
    

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    Twice in Royal David's City

    Posted 5 months ago #
11. 

    riesler
    

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    Ant the Halls

    Posted 5 months ago #
12. 

    Mr Target
    

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    When a Child is Born II

    Posted 5 months ago #
13. 

    Midnight Dreary
    

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    Deck the fucker.

    Posted 5 months ago #
14. 

    Midfield Diamond
    

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    Nowhere near as good as Flash's brilliance but:

    Dub-stepping around the Christmas Tree
    I'm Dreaming of a Multi-ethnic Christmas

    Posted 5 months ago #
15. 

    Scroat
    

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    The Holly and the Oy Vey

    I'll get me coat...

    Posted 5 months ago #
16. 

    Not Amused
    

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    We three kings of orient aren't

    All I want for christmas are my dentures

    Posted 5 months ago #
17. 

    Sir Lupus
    

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    By now they probably do know it's Christmas but just in case here goes again

    O Little Refugee Camps of Beit Jibrin, Aida and Dheisheh

    In the Damp Mid Winter

    The Ritz and The Ivy

    Posted 5 months ago #
18. 

    The All New Jeni B
    

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    We Harked The Herald Angels Sang.

    Oh Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas Tree, How Lovely Were Your Branches.

    Fideste Infideles.

    Silent Morning.

    Posted 5 months ago #
19. 

    riesler
    

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    Back in a manger

    The second Noel

    Good King Wenceslas the Second

    O little suburb of Bethlehem

    Posted 5 months ago #
20. 

    beau-jolly
    

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    The Holly and the Brucie
    Frosty the snowperson

    @Midnight. Spat out my coffee. Thank you.

    Posted 5 months ago #
21. 

    Oxbridge
    

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    Dukla Prague Don't Even Exist Any More

    Posted 5 months ago #
22. 

    ianslat
    

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    I saw Mommy begging the bailiffs not to take the telly

    It's beginning to look a lot like Mike from Sale puking on the boss's shoes

    Posted 5 months ago #
23. 

    Stan Laurel
    

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    (I’m dreaming of a) Dry Christmas

    Rudolph, The Red Nosed Otter

    God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen (but not ye women, obviously)

    Oh Oh Emmanuel, I’m coming

    Posted 5 months ago #
24. 

    sigmund
    

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    The BNP’s favourite, “I’m dreaming of a white England.”
    Having it away in a manger.

    Posted 5 months ago #
25. 

    Al OPecia
    

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    I saw three shits come sailing in on the Breakfast Show in the Morning

    Posted 5 months ago #
26. 

    The All New Jeni B
    

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    In The Bleak Mid-Recession.

    God Rest Ye Gerry Mentalmen.

    Mary's Boy Child (The DSA would like a word).

    Posted 5 months ago #
27. 

    Oxbridge
    

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    Violent Shite

    Posted 5 months ago #
28. 

    Stan Laurel
    

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    ..... Holy Shite!

    Posted 5 months ago #
29. 

    ianslat
    

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    Of course we know it's Christmas, you patronizing bastards!

    Posted 5 months ago #
30. 

    rikkor
    

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    The First "No, 'ell!"

    Posted 5 months ago #

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