Prepare yourself for haggis tapas, bagpipe flamenco and the added excitement of bullfighters in kilts. Both countries have a proud heritage, a separate identity, a host of special traditions and a superior attitude to an adjoining nation.
Scotalonia, as the new state will be called, will have its own parliament, its own judiciary and – if negotiations succeed - its own tartan. Talks are under way between Alejandro Salmone of Catalonia and Arthur McMaster from the Scottish Nationalist Party. The capital will be Barceloburgh or Edilona, or possibly Largos.
One of the first issues to be hammered out by the Scotalonian government will be the issue of North Sea Olive Oil. Former Scots have a traditional suspicion of salad, while ex-Spaniards have little or no experience of porage. A recipe to solve the deadlock has been sought, without success. Football - an obsession for both countries - may too become a political football. But both sides are said to be enjoying the new relationship, sealed by the traditional greeting “Ola the noo!”