The United Nations has announced that they are seeking a team of internet commenters to assist them with a bid to solve the Arab/Israeli problem once and for all.
Secretary General Spoony Banks today revealed plans for the initiative, to be known as "TIL-COWS-PM" or "This is your last chance or we send Piers Morgan".
The UN have spent over $4 billion on researching the plan in the last 6 months and they believe it is foolproof.
"We gave a lot of money to a very respected member of our staff and told him to find a solution. He locked himself away an returned to us several months later with a dark tan, clearly brought on by all the stress he was under.
He has explained to us that on the internet there are many message boards and comment sections run by the world's top news gathering institutions and that these are awash with intelligent people putting forth simple solutions to this age-old clash of civilizations.
It was therefore obvious to us that all we needed to do was find the best of these people and send them to the middle-east to run things for a couple of months", said the Secretary General at a news conference this morning.
He also revealed the selection criteria for becoming a member of the 'Peace Team'. Any member of the human race can apply, with the exception of children as their ideas are seen as too radical.
All anyone has to do is place a comment with their solution to the crisis on a popular media site and the number of votes garnered in favour of it will decide the winners.
The Secretary General summed it up, saying; "No matter how far-fetched an idea might seem if it gets hundreds of votes from people sitting at home in front of their computers then it obviously has to have merit. I mean it's not like we've ever been able to come up with anything useful so clearly we've been doing something wrong. Only yesterday I saw someone put forward the idea of 'Nuke the whole bloody lot of them' and 14 people agreed with him. The fact that we would never have even considered that speaks volumes."
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UN to assemble crack team of Internet commenters to solve Arab/Israeli problem.
(2 posts) (2 voices)
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Posted 6 months ago #
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I'd go further and badge the initiative as a 'Neat-o' so that the best and funniest suggestions can be ranked into a leader board for their peers to admire, sometime before we all got bored of the topic.
The author of the winning suggestion (regardless of whether it subsequently transpires that it was effective when implemented), gets to pick the next problem to be fixed.
....and so on.
Posted 6 months ago #
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