‘You know, I only popped over to Hull to help keep Lord Prescott out of that Police Commissioner’s job,’ Blair told reporters.
‘You turn your back on Israel and Gaza for five minutes and look what happens, bang bang you started it no we didn’t you did bang fucking bang fucking bang. But, look, it just goes to show how good, obviously, I am in that job, when I am doing that job, if I am honest.’
Benjamin Netanyahu is said to be livid with Blair for taking time off every time the war kicks off again. ‘When everything’s quiet, Jerusalem is crawling with peace-makers and Tel Aviv has Nobel Peace Prize winners coming out of its ears,’ he said, ‘but as soon as there’s a spot of bother, they all disappear underground. Honestly, trying to find a reliable peace-maker these days is not easy.’
Blair admits his profession gets over-stretched at times. ‘Look, there’s probably only about four Peace Envoys in the whole world,’ he said in a phone call, ‘coping with a population of 700 billion mainly pissed-off people. It’s a tall order, but let’s see... Well, you’re looking at a week on Monday, mate, at the earliest. Yeah, ten million is what I said. Bit less for cash.’