In a sensational new development, former BBC Director General George Entwistle said he didn’t even know there was a programme called Newsnight: “It’s news to me.” he said.
Rumours also abound on social media sites that Mr Entwistle will be seeking a far bigger payout than the £450,000 he received for 55 days of not knowing what was going on: “I put a lot of hard graft into those 55 days of extended luncheons and think £10 million would be more suitable. Anyway, it’s only fucking money and now Jimmy Carr is paying his taxes the nation can afford it.” If successful, this would equate to £18,1818.18 per day, not far off the hard-pressed average licence payer’s take home pay.
With a memory like that, some are speculating Mr Entwistle may have early onset Alzheimers, whilst others are adamant he could make a very good News International executive.
Lord Patten was unavailable for comment at his ‘Ivory Towers’ residence, as it was his day off and nobody knew where he was.
