In a video statement broadcast this morning on Al-jazzera, the terrorist group Al-Qaeda have admitted responsibility for the destructive attack on the BBC. The attack which has been on-going, and the longest continuous assault in the group's history, started last month and has seen a large number of casualties.
"Although the number of dead careers is not yet known, I can confirm that George Entwistle's career past away at the weekend" Lord Pattern told a press conference. "Unfortunately it was a slow and painful death, despite desperate attempts to keep it alive". Although the terrorist group claimed they took it's life, some reports suggest it sustained the injuries after an incident of friendly fire from John Humphrys.
The spokesman speaking on the video for Al-Qaeda explained they had a 'sleeper cell' deep in the heart of the corporation. "Our brother Mohammad Al-Shawaddywaddy, or Jimmy Savile as you infidels knew him, was put in with the instruction to 'sleep for anything up-to 14 years'. We think he misheard us say 'sleep with anything up-to 14 years', but it seems that bomb created the most damage"
Although claiming most of the glory for the huge amount of damage caused at the BBC, the spokesman did pay credit to the corporation. "Since our assault, they have gone out of their way to show us how it should be done" he told the camera. "BBC News, Panorama and Newsnight have all demonstrated how to carry out the perfect suicide attack".