Today a businessman called Mr Dom wanted to boost the sales for his company "Johnny's" by adding the prefix 'Royal' to the name. Unfortunately, his company sold condoms and after consultation was formally rejected by the establishment on moral grounds.
However, the mad businessman hatched an evil plan. He would fill one of his products with water and then proceed to hurl it at the Queen. According to Mr Dom, being hit by such an item would count as using it.
Mr Dom was later arrested by police on the charge of attempted treason, but was later released on bail. His plan was foiled by a certain corgi. The dog, sensing danger, jumped into the air and burst the dreams of Mr Dom.
Mr Dom now plans to go to the high court to change his company's name legally. He says that as the dog is owned by the Queen and was in contact with the item, there was technically sufficient grounds for such a move.