I'm new to all this. I was attracted by the BBC2 declares war on BBC1 article. I loved it. Then I looked at some others. Very good. It makes me feel like giving it a try myself.
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Hello Everyone
(32 posts) (21 voices)
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The All New Jeni B
offlineMemberWelcome.
Give it a go, but be prepared for constructive criticism.There are some very, very good writers on here (I'm not one), and the advice they can give you is invaluable, so pay heed to what they say.
Good luck, and remember it's just for fun!
Posted 7 months ago # -
charlies_hat
offlineMemberWelcome Mr B. maybe the best advice is to filter your content - many poor posters on here simply type in every single thing that pops into their head. The best subs have generally been loved a little prior to posting. I'm pretty much one liner only, but many of those have been sweated over and many more go in the bin!
Happy posting - its a nice place here.
Posted 7 months ago # -
Anonymous
offlineUnregisteredHi Paddy
And welcome from me too. I've only been here a week or so myself and could do with some company... :)
Anyway - it's certainly a fine site with lots of really excellent writing going on. Not everywhere but mainly. Standards are very high and you've come to a good place. Best tip I can offer is to only submit stuff that you've worked on and polished. Give them your best and I'm sure you'll eventually get noticed.
I'll be lookin' out for you..
Posted 7 months ago # -
antharrison
offlineMemberWelcome. The Eds help out with minor polishing if they like an idea fpr a FP or NIB and other writers will help you to enhance your submissions. It's a friendly place as well. If you trawl the archives you will find some gems such as these:
http://www.newsbiscuit.com/2007/11/18/gerry-adams-bemoans-decline-in-customer-service-242/
and of course
http://www.newsbiscuit.com/2007/10/31/isle-of-wight-to-get-ceefax-230/
Posted 7 months ago # -
charlies_hat
offlineMemberOr of course, follow the honored tradition of bashing homeopathy or organised religion for a surefire winner.
Steer clear of anything that is apple related by putting an "i" at the start of a word, surefire lazyness.
Posted 7 months ago # -
beau-jolly
onlineMemberWelcome. Here's my advise.
If you're not sure which side of the decency line it's on just go for it anyway. (You may need to change your name and wear sunglasses for a bit but you'll soon find the measure - ask DVO)
Another good tip. If you write something you think is funny but everyone else thinks stinks its perfectly aceptable to have a great big hissy fit flouncing sweary tantrum. Always a laugh.
Oh and never accept advice from me. I haven't written anything funny since this; and its still only me who laughs at it (and it was tagged by a troll)Posted 7 months ago # -
Read the guidelines:
http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/forum.php?id=3
Have a go, and learn from the feedback you get. Or lack of it. It's important to be able to differentiate between the people who know what they're talking about and the people who don't. If somebody says they like your sub then they probably know what they're talking about. If somebody says it's shit then they don't know what they're fucking talking about anyway so take no notice of them. Wankers.
That's the policy I stick to anyway.
Posted 7 months ago # -
DustyBinLaden
offlineMemberHi Paddy. Welcome. I'm pretty new here too, but for what it's worth:
- avoid funny names (Badger Kevin Davies is funnier than Badger Stripey McFatArse - arguable, but an editorial no-no)
- always aim for a cracking headline; it's what draws people into your story, and great stories with poor headlines often don't get read
- always aim for a great finishing sentence
- keep it lean; if in doubt, cut it out
- stay on target; keep the narrative consistent with the headline - it's easy to ramble off the point
- dive in; better to put something up and see what feedback you get (bearing in mind CH's point about giving your piece a bit of TLC beforehand) than nurture a piece for days only to find it could have benefited from some feedback a lot earlier
- always check that there is sufficient swearing in your piece; if in doubt, add some moreThat last one is a personal approach rather than, perhaps, a hard and fast editorial guideline.
Best of luck
Posted 6 months ago # -
waylandsmithy
offlineMemberNever carry a small dog in a bag. It's undignified, and the dog will grow to resent you.
Posted 6 months ago # -
The All New Jeni B
offlineMemberStill no better Rikkor?
Have you spoken to your Dr?
Or vet?Posted 6 months ago # -
Mary Evans
offlineMemberHi Paddy, welcome to the picnic. A few pointers:
1) Don't be upset when people accuse you of being someone else
2) Sound sufficiently different from your pseudonyms so as not to arouse suspicion
3) Should you elect to leave the site, this must be done in a very public, temperamental and thoroughly reversible fashion
4) Write funny stuff and people will like you. Until they resent your success and claim favouritism. It's all a big clique here anyway.Hope that helps - enjoy!
MxPosted 6 months ago # -
Ironduke
offlineMemberI received the photo Rikkor.
Whilst you have my sympathy, and I can certainly see it would cause fundamental ripening agony, please on no account send me similar literature ever again.
It is burnt on my retinas so deep I can even see your ass when I close my eyes, and my tears won't wash away the stain of your imagery. I do hope someone can help your ass, but that someone is most definitely not me.
Posted 6 months ago #
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