Government defends Reeves' claim she walked on the Moon
"Rachel is a key member of Labour's team who has got Britain's economy booming again with her masterfully shrewd Budget measures," lied a...
US contracts out foreign policy to Israel
The US announced today that it’s officially contracting out its foreign policy to Israel. “It’s not such a big change really,” said...
Orange Order Holding Open Auditions
In order to arrest falling numbers, and ensure marching season in 2025 doesn't look like a group of friends on a summer stroll, the...
Trump picks Hannibal Lector for Surgeon General
In a relatively uncontroversial pick by his standards, President-Elect Donald Trump has named Dr Hannibal Lecter his choice to be the...
Starmer: Nuclear Armagedon will keep OAPs warm
The Government have a radical plan to heat UK homes this winter, by goading Putin into WW3. Instead of breaking tariffs and importing...
International Arrest Warrant Issued for David Walliams
The International Criminal Court has taken the unprecedented step of issuing an international arrest warrant for author and TV...
Trump to become gay icon on day one
Donald Trump has threatened to become a gay icon as soon as he takes office. The president-elect says he will, if necessary, use the...
Budget Black Hole due to planned Starmer Pyramid Tomb
The 20 billion black hole in the UK budget, suspiciously brought to light only after Labour came to office finally has an explanation...
Unwavering support as wobbly as f*ck
Translators have explained to Ukraine that the verbal support offered by their NATO allies, should be taken with a massive pinch of salt...
Britain to be matt-finished by 2035
PM Sir Keir Starmer has reiterated his commitment to have nothing shiny left in Britain within the next decade. In a statement today the...