MPs blamed the Painter & Decorators for glossing over details.
'It's all fabrication' said Textile workers. Backed by the Upholstery union's ''We have nothing to cover-up'. Plumbers tried flushing out the truth, but Bricklayers blocked the vote.
As Backbenchers tried moving forward on equal opportunities, the Scaffolders just got high.
The Police Federation arrested all black delegates, but the Actors Union pretended not to notice. Paramedics held an emergency meeting, as the Bridge Builder's Union pushed their stop gap measures.
The debate heated up as Steel workers rolled out their plans, but the Fire Fighters dowsed their suggestions. The sporting unions wanted a level playing field, but the Rugby Union was out of its league and fell into a scrum. The Cricketers hit a sticky wicket, and the Boxers punched a hole in one of the Golfers, who complained the Athletics Guild just ran around in circles.
The Dentists drilled into them. ‘All you say is Ah!’ shouted the Opticians and brought them back to focus. ‘We need looking after.’ shouted the Royal College of Nurses, but the Midwives suggestion was stillborn. So the Domestic’s Union tried a joke about bankers cleaning up, but it just left a vacuum.
The Meteorologist’s warned of storm clouds, but the Scientists said there was no empirical evidence. The Minister for Work and Pensions retired to the toilet where he found the Tenant’s Union delegate with a rent boy, and the Crane Driver’s with a hooker.
Teachers spelled out their demands, but the Writer’s Guild didn’t care a jot.
The Fishermen carped on, but the Plasterers got tired of filling in cracks.
The Farmer's Union ploughed through them scattering opinion, to cries of 'Seedy!'.
'It's time we put this to rest' exclaimed the Undertakers. 'Trust you to dig that up', the Archaeologists replied.
'You can't say things like that!' said the Royal College of Speech Impediment Specialists.
'Th t's j st typ c l', a Patient with one leg trying to stand up for the disabled nearly said.
The Composers waxed lyrical, to shouts of 'Change the record mate!' from the Musician's Union. 'Scratch that!' said the Engravers, but where shouted down by the Opera Singer's Union, only to be jeered at by the Dieticians.
The Amalgamated Union of Amalgam Makers blended in with everyone.
When the Health & Safety Executive complained it was all unsound, the Matchmakers called for a strike. The Electricians tried sparking off a new debate, but the Wigmaker's Union pulled the rug. The Carpenters demanded a new cabinet, agreed the Nail makers had a fair point, but saw no rhyme or reason in the Poet’s argument. ‘Unfair!’ cried Equity. The Train Drivers went off the rails, and the Transport Union drove everyone nuts.
Finally, the Rambler's Union lead a mass walkout.
Toady in Parliament - the Trades Union Debate
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MPs blamed the Painter & Decorators for glossing over details.Posted 4 years ago #
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