Urban environmentalists have launched a campaign to raise awareness of the increased detarmacation of the world's concrete jungles. The mass 'soiling' of the world's towns and cities is the direct result of ruthless green campaigners' demands that buildings and pathways are ripped up and replaced by trees, plants, and other forms of modern foliage.
Sue Taylor, spokesperson for the urban campaigners Greypiece, put the size of the problem into context for us.'Every day, detarmacation clears concrete jungles the size of Wales. Sometimes it is Wales. The redevelopment of Cardiff Docks saw daffodils outnumbering houses by 14 to 1. People can not live in that sort of environment. A flower bed may be nice to look at, but it's useless to sleep in.
The undevelopment of cities and towns is having a huge impact on the Amazon. The internet store's UK head office is based in Britain's largest concrete jungle, Slough. One of the endangered species that works there told us of the effect on her life. 'I used to be able to take the car to work with no fear. However the company's green policy saw 15 parking spaces callously dug up and replaced with bushes. I now have to run the risk of a 5 minute walk where anything could happen'. One local doctor has warned the danger of getting fit has endangered the indigenous obese population.
It is not only humans that are being put at risk. Scientists have told us they know of at least one case of extinction caused by the felling of old factories and tower blocks. Professor Herman Jupp claims there have been no sightings of 'Insulatious Carcinogenus' in it's natural habitat for many years. 'Asbestos, to give it it's common name, has become increasingly rare in the environment. Although they may think this is a good result, it has seen an increase in life expectancy in the green campaigners natural predator, the builder'
It is hoped that the campaign will raise awareness to the problem, and also help recruit activists to help in the fight against environmentalists. However, the recruitment drive has started a war of words between the two sides. 'If they are caught damaging flowers, bushes or newly planted trees, they should be punished accordingly' the Green Party's Caroline Lucas warned. 'Our policy will be to bring back public hanging, and we have the floral baskets ready'.