Single fathers attempting to choose their children’s upper school have called for an official OFSTED MILF rating for all schools. Brian Smith, a single parent of two, has spoken of the time he wasted on a recent school open evening listening to a lot of waffle from the headmistress and looking at the school facilities “When a quick glance around the auditorium clearly showed a good 25% of MILFs. It’s a no brainer! Unless any of the other schools can beat that, it’s where my child is going, and I’m joining the PTA.”
Brian went on to explain “I’ve got two weeks of these school inspections, each taking up some two hours of my valuable evening, time I could have spent more productively at work, or down the pub. This school was quite a posh one, so lots of yummie mummies who have time to keep themselves looking fit while their husband flogs himself to death in a pointless, not quite well paid job in order to suport his family. Let’s face it, their husband probably commutes so won’t be home for hours and is quite likely getting off with Debbie from accounts anyway. Either that or they are divorced, or he’s dead, which saves complications.”
Brian is calling for the MILF rating “In order to save myself trawling around the lower end schools where the MILF score is likely to be far lower, and even then they will be poverty stricken single mums, most likely far too young for me. I just want a simple OFSTED site where I can put in my age, and get a percentage of likely candidate MILFs. Job done, child in a new school.”
In a similar vein, Brian’s ex-wife Debbie has been calling for OFSTED of implement a FILF factor for “Men who wear trousers that fit, don’t spend so long at work or at the pub, don’t treat their laptop like a lover and their wife like a machine, and know what and where a Clitoris is.”
Hat tip to Shitsu
