The palace were pleased to announce that Sir Paul McCartney has already signed a deal to perform his crowd-pleasing classic ‘Hey Jude’ at the funeral of Prince Philip, despite the fact that he’s still alive.
A royal spokesman reported the news on Friday’s Daybreak, stating that the Duke of Edinburgh is “absolutely delighted” at the prospect of such a massive celebrity appearing at his funeral. “Phil’s always felt a little overshadowed by his wife, so he believes that having a real timeless national treasure present at his burial will finally give him a moment in the limelight – and not because he’s been a bigoted old twat for once”, said the representative.
Sir Paul has also been reported as happy with the deal and looking forward for another opportunity to make a mess of a globally-broadcasted British event. When approached for his opinion on the Palace’s only concern surrounding the situation - that he will kick the bucket before the Duke – he simply stated, “na na naaa naaa, na na naaa naaa, naaaa naaaa naaaa, he’s doomed”.