The Supreme Being has confirmed He will form a working coalition with former adversary Satan, in response to the challenge posed by a leading Atheist party.
Speaking through an emotionally-troubled pubescent girl in southern Venezuela, God insisted ideological differences between His Heavenly Host and the festering masses of Hell were purely superficial, and that they agreed on many important policies.
"After we sat down together, we realised many of our differences were merely semantic" claimed the Deity, through His emaciated vassal. "Our positions on smiting are broadly similar, as is our capacity to maintain seemingly contradictory viewpoints simultaneously."
"However" He went on, whilst drawing the face of the Virgin Mary on an empanada, "we continue to believe that homosexual relations should be restricted to those below the age of consent and within the authority of the Church. We can reassure our followers that Hell's stance on consensual gay relations between adults will not be part of the deal. We will not let Satan in through the back door, as it were."
Sceptics believe the coalition is a tenuous one, with each party more interested in consolidating a shrinking power base than meeting the needs of the People.
"With none of the 3 main parties able to wrestle a majority amongst The Meek, a key marginal in the eternal battle for supremacy, then compromise was inevitable" said one observer, adding "Satan's promotion to Deputy Deity will not go down well with the incumbent, either."
Professor Richard Dawkins, de facto head of the Atheist movement, welcomed news of the coalition, adding; "This is simply another example of the moral hypocrisy perpetuated by religious leaders. Their desperate manoeuvring, coupled with the fact they don't actually exist, can only strengthen our position in the future."
The Prince of Darkness was unavailable for comment.