The Royal Mail have written to a customer in the Rochdale area after they began receiving envelopes containing waste food addressed ‘Kids in Africa’. To ensure the swift delivery of the letter, it has been sent by UPS.
The packages to the ‘kids in Africa’ have been sent from 12 year old Thomas Hardy. ‘Every dinner time I would leave some food on my plate‘, he told us whilst playing with a Lego Harry Potter. ‘My Mum always said that there are kids in Africa that would love to have that food.’
‘She said that, but then she kept on leaving the waste food in a separate bag for the bin man’ he continued as he pulled Harry’s head off. ‘I’m not saying he doesn’t enjoy it, but he’s a bit fat and smokes a lot, so I think he can afford his own food. That’s why I have started sending the leftovers to the kids in Africa.’
The local Royal Mail sorting office say they now have a problem with rats in their lost mail section and that they have no option to send the packages back to the sender. But as a spokesman for the Royal Mail told us, the problem is bigger than just rats.
‘The obvious public health issue is the least of our worries. The letters to the kids in Africa have no postcode and there is now a bill of £28.96p in unpaid postage. That’s a serious issue.’
The parents of the 12 year old say they are now concerned about how many other things their son has taken seriously. His worried Mother told us ‘three times I have had to use the Heimlich Manoeuvre after I told him to ‘put a sock in it’, but that was not as hard as apologising to his best friend’s parents. He should never have convinced him to jump off a cliff just so he could check his own reaction.’
Although a bit of a menace, the Royal Mail spokesman told us of one positive result of the food parcels. ‘we have managed to dismiss one worker who had a habit of putting his hand in letters to see if there was any money. We found out what he was doing just after dipped into an envelope full of beans and tomato ketchup. He tried to deny it but we caught him red-handed’