Fears that violent anti-Western protests would escalate have receded after the US air force successfully dropped millions of topless Kate Middleton pictures throughout the Muslim world.
“God is great but Kate is hot!” chanted a mob in Jordon as they scattered from outside the American Embassy in search of the nearest public toilets. There were similar scenes in Iran as glassy-eyed rioters looked skyward in the hope that Pippa Middleton pictures would follow.
US Military sources were pleased with the success of the operation, but denied it was a pre-cursor to a more serious strike on Iran: “While we are not ruling it out in the future, there are no current plans to drop naked Camilla pictures” said General Adams.