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1. 

   waylandsmithy
   

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   "Doctors hate her."

   Is that the key to flat skin? Being despised by a GP? I'll have to get the missus to run his dog over.

   or are we to assume this 'mum' used to regularly make appointments at her local practice, to complain about her terrible wrinkles?

   Stupid cow. I hope she gets fat ankles.

   Posted 8 months ago #
2. 

   kimllfixit
   

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   "Try this weird old tip for a flatter belly"

   Why do the advertisers think that describing something as 'weird' will attract me to it? The creepy gif file accompanying the claim is not selling it to me either.

   Posted 8 months ago #
3. 

   Gerontius
   

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   As ever....now looks like a 30 year old but still farts like a 50 year old

   Posted 8 months ago #
4. 

   The All New Jeni B
   

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   I recently bumped into a girl who was at school with me. She had a completely immobile face, perfectly line free and smooth, but so botoxed that even speech was difficult for her.

   I did so love the fact that she suggested I might like the number of the girl who did her 'work' as she thought I had areas which could do with some 'improvements'.

   Pity she couldn't move her face too well, she might then have seen the slap I gave her coming.

   Posted 8 months ago #
5. 

   sigmund
   

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   'she might then have seen the slap I gave her coming’
   You could have waited until she’d finished. ;)

   Posted 8 months ago #
6. 

   JohnA
   

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   There an advert for "Nice 'n Easy" hair colouring at the moment which features some model bloke saying about his model wife "Kate" that after all these years and after having two kids, she looks the same as she always did.

   Man: "I don't know how she does it"

   A: It may be Nice 'n Easy on the hair but its definitely BOTOX on the face and neck. The complete absence of any wrinkles points to botox injections so dense that she can't stop smiling - literally.

   Posted 8 months ago #

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