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1. 

   beau-jolly
   

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   Inspired by the heroics of London 2012 I started to think what I could do which would take 4 years training and get me a free holiday place at Rio 2016. Then I realised that I would be damn near 60 by then. Even the small bores are younger than that.
   Any suggested sports? Anyone else suitably insired to come to Rio with me? What sport will you be doing?

   Posted 1 year ago #
2. 

   tedweasel
   

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   We have an eight man synchronised drinking team in Ilkley and despite training for over 30 hours a week we receive no funding from the Lottery.
   We've written to the IOC but, as yet, no reply.

   Posted 1 year ago #
3. 

   Nowherefast
   

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   Synchronised Channel Surfing .. Mastering the average TV/STB remote has become a very challenging pastime.

   Posted 1 year ago #
4. 

   Stan Laurel
   

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   Cat dressage.

   Posted 1 year ago #
5. 

   Vertically Challenged Giant
   

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   I've taken up rowing having been inspired by the GB woman who won gold despite only starting the sport 4 years ago. I'm training in my local by drinking massive amounts of stella and rowing with anybody that looks at me funny.

   I reckon by the time Rio 2016 comes around I'll be a world class rower able to argue with the best of them.

   Posted 1 year ago #
6. 

   butagirl
   

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   For some reason, "cat dressage" had me giggling like a lunatic.

   Posted 1 year ago #
7. 

   The All New Jeni B
   

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   May I remind you all of the Team GB Squirrel-Licking squad?

   As coach, I'm always on the lookout for new talent, and although a certain degree of speed and agility is required, age is no barrier.

   Details of our fantastic sport are available through the NB search facility. Anyone interested in coming along for a taster session should let me know....

   Posted 1 year ago #
8. 

   beau-jolly
   

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   I don't know why I forgot this but many years ago and after only a hour or so's training I came in Silver medal position in the Rutland all-comers pidgeon plucking competition. (No, honestly that bit is true!) With 4 years training I recon' I could strip the little buggers of their feathers in the blink of an eye. A small step to licking squirels but no oven-ready game as a by-product.

   Cat dressage? Hmmmm. I think under-water soot juggling may be easier.

   Posted 1 year ago #
9. 

   bonjonelson
   

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   I assume Badger Fisting isn't on the 2016 roster

   Posted 1 year ago #
10. 

    beau-jolly
    

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    Phew! I followed a link and then another and suddenly there I was in the dark side; Thigh deep among the pro-celebrity squirrel lickers of the beta version. I just managed to back-space my way out before the "real" world slipped away for ever.

    Posted 1 year ago #
11. 

    Psycadelic Squirrel
    

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    Where do I sign up?

    Posted 1 year ago #
12. 

    Actual Size
    

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    I reckon I could ride that moped in the velodrome and put enough petrol in to challenge for a medal or failing that - extreme grouting or jumping to conclusions.

    Posted 1 year ago #
13. 

    bonjonelson
    

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    With Maddie and Lord Lucan, we can certainly put out a strong Hide and Seek team

    Posted 1 year ago #
14. 

    Gerontius
    

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    Laying the table-tennis.
    You have to get the doilleys and cutlery in the right order....one misplaced soup spoon and it's four penalty faults. Get the salt & pepper in the wrong order and you're disqualified. Yes, it's tough...but this is the Olympics.

    Posted 1 year ago #
15. 

    godly1966
    

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    You don’t need to be an athlete, become a coach. I’ve offered my services to the female rowers and beach volley ball teams. If that fails why not doggy dancing they have dressage (horse dancing) don’t they.

    Posted 1 year ago #
16. 

    riesler
    

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    Lounging by the pool.

    Posted 1 year ago #
17. 

    riesler
    

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    Synchronised trying-to-get-past-someone-in-a-corridor.

    Posted 1 year ago #
18. 

    The All New Jeni B
    

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    Rhythmic Queuing.

    Synchronised Apologising.

    Beach Hot-Sand Running.

    Posted 1 year ago #
19. 

    The All New Jeni B
    

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    Multiple Melting Ice-Cream Carrying.

    Shopping Bag Lifting.

    Avoiding Eye Contact on Public Transport.

    Obnoxious Child Breeding. (Although the Americans are strong contenders.)

    Tutting.

    Posted 1 year ago #
20. 

    beau-jolly
    

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    Godly; That's it! As far as I can see the coach doesn't have to be fit at all. He just needs to have a 1970s moustache and hairstyle. Also the girls do what ever he tells them to (see Olga Korbut)

    Posted 1 year ago #
21. 

    godly1966
    

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    I’ve decided to offer my services to the synchronised swimmer’s, I have come up with a great way for them to practice holding there breath.

    Posted 1 year ago #
22. 

    Sinnick
    

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    Men's or women's ?

    Posted 1 year ago #
23. 

    godly1966
    

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    Luckily there’s only a women’s team.

    Posted 1 year ago #
24. 

    Midnight Dreary
    

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    I believe Dogging is a demonstration sport next time.

    Posted 1 year ago #
25. 

    JohnA
    

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    My boss tells me I'm good for the high jump. How would he know?

    Posted 1 year ago #

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