The government is today celebrating the start of two weeks it has been looking forward to for a long time. With the country’s attention focused on the Olympics in London, not since the death of Princess Diana has there been a better time to bury bad news and pass controversial legislation.
‘We tested the water by announcing a drop in GDP whilst everyone else was talking about the start of the Olympics football tournament’ a source close to the cabinet told us. ‘Who would have thought that news the country was slipping deeper into recession and on the verge of bankruptcy would be eclipsed by women’s football of all things. It just goes to show how easy this will be’.
With the opening ceremony still to come and a fortnight of running and jumping ahead, the public can expect a wave of announcements to ignore. Another rise in fuel duty, the ‘get out of jail free card‘ for Cameron‘s freinds, and Nick Clegg’s bonus of 2 bags of Haribo and a can of Coke are just some of the controversial measures set to be released, and as our source tells us, timing is everything.
‘The proposal to cut every male salary by 25% to match their female counterparts could cause the biggest reaction, that’s why we will announce that during the women’s beach volley ball final’