George Osborne tried to further excuse immoral and greedy behaviour within the upper classes and big business by suggesting individuals are keeping huge amounts in offshore accounts due to being “sensitive, light sleepers”, making the traditional low risk mattress investment model impossible.
Claims that many bankers and city types already have difficulty sleeping due to being the target of the nation’s collective hate, levels of which haven’t been witnessed since the Myra Hindley trial in 1966, have triggered fears amongst the shadow cabinet that exemptions in the crack down on tax avoidance will be allowed on medical grounds.
Ed Balls said yesterday “The Tories want you to think that your local plumber doing a ‘homer’ or giving cash discounts is the UK’s hidden economy, but truth is that tradesmen sleep too deeply due to actually doing a hard days work to notice all the billions tucked under their collective mattresses.”
