Top UK glamour model Teresa May has failed to become the country's first sexy Home Secretary because a government typist inadvertently added an 'h' to her first name.
Instead, Theresa May, the boring Conservative MP for Maidenhead, has been appointed Home Secretary in the Cameron government.
'I'm gutted,' pouted Teresa May. 'Just because a typist couldn't spell my name, I've been robbed of achieving my life ambition of becoming a glamorous Conservative home secretary'.
A government spokesman admitted embarrassment over the mix-up. He said:
'David Cameron wanted Teresa as our home secretary. When you're cracking down on immigrants or locking people up indefinitely, it's best done by a naked model reclining on a leopard-skin couch than by a frumpy middle-aged woman in tweeds sitting behind a desk. This is worse than having Charles Clarke or John Reid at the Home Office'.
Home Secretary Theresa May said:
'I know just how Teresa feels. I once lost a job as a stripper because someone underestimated my vital statistics.'