John Entwistle will be the next Director General of the BBC, it has been announced. Described as “a safe pair of hands”, the ex-Who bassist rose to rock stardom before dying of a cocaine-induced heart attack after a night with groupie stripper in 2002.
Culture Secretary Jeremy Hunt has voiced his approval of the appointment, saying, “He is someone who is hugely respected throughout the organisation, and outside the organisation. And naturally I am a huge fan of ‘Boris the Spider’”.
A tough challenge even for the living, Entwistle will face the tricky balancing act of attempting to please newspaper critics with serious and original broadcasting while also satisfying millions of licence-fee payers who demand entertainment and sport which the corporation will struggle to deliver thanks to reduced funding and digital competitors.
In summary, expect even more Pete Townshend documentaries on BBC4.