Following the discovery of the Higgs boson scientists at CERN have announced that the LHC can now turn its attention to more practical work. Having demonstrated its ability to find something infinitesimally small and of which many people doubted the very existence the LHS seems perfectly suited for the task of demonstrating whether or not such a thing as a banker's conscience does exist.
High level bankers, which are found in great profusion near the LHC's home in Switzerland, will be collided at high speeds repeatedly over the coming months. Scientists will be observing to see whether the ensuing damage results in any hints of regret or negative feelings, considered as the trace elements of a conscience.
"We are not particularly optimistic of any real proof emerging," confirmed lead scientist on the project Nathan West, "but at least everybody should vote to maintain our funding if we spend our time smashing banker's heads together."