Chancellor George Osbourne will tomorrow announce to the House of Commons new proposals to take on the tooth fairy.
Long a feature on the UK's financial services horizon, more recently the tooth fairy has come into strong criticism from left and right of the political spectrum for its complex derivative trading operations.
The transfer of once-fixed assets - aka the 'tooth' - in a currency transaction, frequently conducted in low-level denominations, cash-in-hand without due oversight of the tax authorities has become a target for the more populist members of the Conservative Party.
Dentine Norries, a prominent backbench critic of both the PM David Cameron and Chancellor George Osbourne, has been particularly vociferous in her challenge to the close connections between key party donors and leading members of the tooth fairy industry. Those connections were sharply highlighted earlier this year in the so-called Col-Gate scandal, in which Colonel Herbert MacLean was forced from his post as Tory party treasurer after he was found not to have registered his role in a transfer of funds from the tooth fairy to his 5-year-old daughter Esme.
In advance of the Chancellor's announcement, the Treasury was forced tonight to put out a statement denying that the government would now do or say anything to deflect attention from its ineptitude. 'Critics of our new tooth fairy regulations should get in the real world,' they told gathered reporters.