A government thinktank has proposed a radical new plan to redeploy thousands of out of work bankers into agriculture. Faced with the concerns of future food shortages, bankers will be tasked with re-engineering orchards to bear more low-hanging fruit. Any greenfield opportunities will be used for pastures, which will be neatly fenced with value-chain. Bankers will be teamed with marketing executives and assigned to tourist areas for blue-sky thinking to combat England's reputation for poor weather. If the trial is successful, a second phase is proposed whereby advertising executives will be prohibited from brainstorming sessions in all but drought stricken parts of Africa, where mind showers may be appreciated for the first time. In responding to criticism from environmental activists that this may contribute to climate change, bankers stated "we're working on screwing up that part of the world too". Car manufacturers have requested exemption from the plan, for fear that bankers would attempt to reinvent the wheel
Greenfield Opportunities to be used for agriculture in government plan
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