Sociologists have today announced that reading Fifty Shades of Grey is the gateway for women to progress to hard forms of pornography and even indulging in public self sexual gratification.
Thirty something and Middle aged women are the groups most at risk, whilst social commentators have pointed out that if a man was to sit reading pron in a public place it would be cause for police intervention, the signing of the sex offenders register and being labeled "a dirty old man".
"It's wimmin's rights gone mad I tell ya" said Fred Filchfinger (55) yesterday. "they're sitting around reading their high brow 'erotic fiction' as though it's no different from reading Austin, Anais Nin, Nancy Friday or Henry Miller. Yet if I pulls out a copy of Hustler or Big Jugs Weekly in a park or on the train, they don't half kick up a stink. Where's the equality in that?"
So far there have been a handful of cases where women have started openly pleasuring themselves in public in laundrettes, on bikes and mopeds down cobbled streets and on bass heavy speakers. We even have isolated incidents where women have been so wound up by the exploits of Mr Grey that they have started up their Rampant Rabbits and Love eggs on buses, trains and park benches.