There was shock today among leading analysts as Lord Leveson made the bizarre decision to call the BBC Test Match Special team to the inquiry as his new co-commentry team.
The trio of Geoffrey Boycott, Jonathan Agnew and Michael Vaughan have been requested by Lord Leveson to provide their famous detailed analysis of the technique and ability of some of the world's leading smarmy media figures appearing before the committee.
However some of the early analysis has baffled leading members of the media. Jonathan Agnew described Tony Blair as 'an old pro' although pointing out that 'he's been out of the side for quite a long while now'. Geoffrey Boycott praised Blair's ability to bat away questions: 'look at his hands Jonathan,' he said 'some lovely supple wrists there, working the question off his chest to safety. It was a mighty deflection but he was in control as he gave Leveson the slip. Smashing.' He also had a very favourable opinion of Rebekah Brooks 'Would you look at her! She's a cracking lass that one. I like her. I'd like to touch her thigh pad. I hope she doesn't wear a box.' He also had great praise for Heather Mills, calling her the best short leg he'd ever seen.
The judgement on inquirer QC Robert Jay has been mixed, with his attack on James Murdoch getting praise from Michael Vaughan: 'Ooh that was a hostile delivery there from Mr. Jay but the Lad's done well there, played it nicely off onto the politicians'. However Geoffrey Boycott expressed a much lower opinion of Mr Jay claiming: 'That's buffet questioning for me. He's not asking difficult questions of the bastards. My Gran could've mumbled her way out of that one. If he'd been questioned back when I played, he would've got a right caning. Police brutality my arse. Uncovered Truncheon in the back of the head.'
However the association between Judge Leveson and TMS appears to have ended before it's begun, after Rupert Murdoch had a cricket ball thrown at him by Mr. Boycott, crying 'You stole cricket from terrestrial, you SKY bastard'. Luckily for Boycott, he escaped down the corridor of uncertainty. The result of Murdoch's testimony had to be decided on Duckworth/Lewis method, and thus he is to be executed next thursday. On a lighter note, all witnesses will now be required to wear pads and a helmet from now on. And security will be checking everyone's balls before they go in.