This is mad:
If you think that's bad, you should see what Roger Waters did to his pig.
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Never underestimate the lengths people who show anything (dogs, cows, horses, cars, flowers, vegetables etc) in competitions will go to in order to win.
Examples include the breeder who gave drugs to his dogs to stop them producing tears so they wouldn't stain their white coats, and the owner who insisted on breeding their unfortunate puppy with deformed elbows because he was from such a good line 'it was only fair to the breed'.
I think Simon Cowell has pumped his teats with gas and sealed them up to win a different animal show called The X Factor.
So an inflated cow can fetch £100,000. Getting caught risks a fine of £5,000. Hand me that bicycle pump.
I used to have a girlfriend I had to fill with air, but only after I had got her out of the box
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