You may have heard of the country Greece in the news recently. They are expected to join the UK in not only being a country that is in Europe but not in the Euro, but will also be bankrupt. We thought we would take this opportunity to trawl through Wikipedia and bring you this ‘Idiots Guide to ........Greece’
Greece was discovered in 1923 by a package holiday company who, in the days before GPS, overshot Spain and carried on down the Mediterranean. The name ‘Greece’ and is derivative of the English word ‘Greasy’. It was given this name because of the oilier than usual ground the country is build on.
Since its inception, Greece has produced its fair share of influential people. Famous names from Greece include Aristotle, Plato, John Travolta, and the Dragons’ Den entrepreneur who made his millions in the Mexican food business, Theo Fajitas.
Greeks from the olden days were known for being good at maths. One of their better known mathematicians, Pythagoras, created a theorem that could tell you the exact moment Emmerdale would be repeated if you missed the original repeat on a sister channel. His equation a2 + b2 = (ITV2+1) is still taught in schools to this day.
Religion is rife in Greece, however unlike many modern civilisations that have only one made up God, Greece has enough of them to fill Wembley Stadium twice over. Among the more well-known Gods is Aphrodite the Goddess of love, Apollo the God of average BBC comedy and Pisspoor the God of Austerity.
When it comes to sport the Greeks lead the way. With their elaborate sports day named after a Little Chef breakfast, the Olympics tours the world with athletes showing what can be done with hard work, passion, and anabolic steroids. The Greeks are so keen on sports the even named a town after a London race. If ever you are in Greece, be sure to visit the town of Virgin (formerly Flora) Marathon.
Culturally, Greece does not have much to offer. Before the economic crisis, they would smash crockery as a means of celebration and washing-up avoidance, but this tradition has now been somewhat ruined by the more cost effective use of paper plates.
When in Greece, we highly recommend trying the national dish Moussaka. If however the thought of constant rioting and fires in the street puts you off, you can have a ‘Greek night in’ at home by simply slapping a Lasagne on top of an aubergine.
So that's all you need to know about Greece. To understand more about Greece's financial problems, go into your bank and ask for £2m, note the rejection, and decide to start paying for things with shirt buttons
Disclaimer; this guide is intended to be a guide only and as such, its accuracy is only guaranteed to the same level of a Sunday tabloid front page. Any likeness to any real country, either alive or dead, is purely coincidental. Your home is at risk if Greece does not keep up repayments on its country or any loan/bailout secured on it