"We feel like we have not only let the public down, but ourselves too, said a representative for Compare-U-Ware website today. We could not come up with a daft dog, racist meerkat, singing oaf or schizophrenic stick person to pedal our dubious services, and the great British public expect that from us. At this rate we will have to fall back to Keith Chegwin, and that frankly is a road none of us want to walk down"
Keith Chegwin could be reached for comment but he was ignored.