Following the success of extreme Right Wing candidate Marine Le Pen in the French election and growing fears over Iran’s plans for their uranium enrichment plants fears that the Germans will start a final apolitical battle are virtually non-existent.
“They may even be our allies in a third World War,” was the opinion of MOD Chief Ian McKeane. “Imagine the shame of returning home from a war and having to tell your parents a German saved you. Most will probably hide it.”
It is particularly confusing to the younger generation, raised on stories of the previous great wars. “Germany started World War I, Germany stated World War II now Iran is going to start World War III? That’s a stupid ending to the Trilogy, like Ewoks stupid. By the way can we just finish this triology already? The fourth is usually a reboot where everything is fun again. The world really needs rebooted”
The economic toil they could cause to the world of comedy cannot be understated. Many older comics make a living reminding people about the holocaust for a few laughs. “If we fight alongside Germany that means I’ve only got one joke left,” cried Ian Hislop, “there are only so many variations of ‘John Prescott is fat’ I can do.”
Football pundit Alan Shearer laughed off our concerns. “Write Germany off at your peril. No one ever expects them to do well but that old cliché about German efficiency always wins out in the end. I’m fully confident if anyone will murder us all it will be them”
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Germany starting World War III, “looking less likely.”
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