Hellraising bassist and Motorhead frontman, Lemmy, was today the centre of a storm over a garden wall he's erected around his country mansion.
The cockahoop heavy metal star told GMTV. "It's a project I started some years ago and it's taken up all my spare time since. I couldn't make up my mind if I wanted barbed wire or gun turrets along the top, so in the end I plumped for a mixture of both. I hope that it will lend my garden that certain something that up until now has been missing. If all goes well I'm hoping to enter the finished job in my local Gardens in Bloom competition"
But Lemmy's neighbour, Col. Bygraves Fortescue, slammed the hapless bassist's erection. "I don't hold with this type of fellow at all. He's forever biting the heads off bats and quite frankly it's just not cricket.
He needn't think that he can just come and live in our community and expect to be accepeted by bigots like me. This wall is a monstrosity and must come down at once!"
The Motorhead frontman's record company released the following statement last night.
"Col. Fortescue is confusing Lemmy with somebody else. He's never bitten the head off anything whatsoever, well perhaps the odd jelly baby but that's it."
Dairmuid Gavin, BBC's garden supremo, is believed to be the mastermind behind the wall's design but was keeping a low profile last night as the storm raged through the leafy shire village.