Putin: election protesters will be disappeared
Vladimir Putin, newly elected Russian president said that his election was free and fair, and that if anyone disagreed they would be imprisoned without trial.
The ballots have all come in from the Central Ballot Printing Press, and they are all as my staff predicted -a massive victory for me. The runner up, the communist candidate, was unexpected, but it turned out that one of the ballot presses has not been used since 1989 and was still configured to vote for that party.
Putin added, with this result, I can declare myself president for life. Or, continuing the tradition of Brezhnev and Yeltsin, leaders of the USSR in the past, I can stay president for a few years after my death.