In an event that should have shocked no one Manchester United managed to grind out a scrappy election win over Mitt Romney and have now set their sights on the White House.
In his concession speech Romney admitted this result was always likely, “They just know how to win don’t they?” Most in the media had written off the Red Devils, claiming that they could not compete with the vast fortunes of the opposition but in the end the winning mentality instilled by Sir Alex Ferguson was said to be the difference.
United’s star man, Wayne Rooney said, “Erm, obviously delighted. Erm, we just believed we could win and, erm, kept playing. Erm, we respect Barack Obama, erm, but obviously we, erm, want to be the ones to, erm, lead the free world.”
Panic was thought to have gripped the Democratic Party in Washington last night. They believe that Barack Obama plays better politics but that Ferguson’s experience will be a deciding factor. They also fear what affect Fergies mind games could have on Obama after witnessing Rick Santorum falling to the ground in the fatal position in reaction to the term, “squeaky bum time.”
Knowing they're in trouble there were rumours circling that the Democrats have been in contact Pep Guardiola with plans for Barcelona to replace President Obama in the Presidential race in November as they are seen as the only people who can beat United consistently.
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Manchester United Win GOP Nominee Race
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