Spice Girls to reunite and form one giant Spice Girl
(4 posts) (3 voices)
A bit more on this then.....
Britain's favourite ageing harridans, the Spice Girls, are to reunite for a show with a terrifying new twist, Mel B has let slip.
In an interview with an Australian television channel, Mel B revealed the five 'girls' will reunite for a concert to mark the Queen's Jubilee later this year, and that, during the event, they will merge to create one, all-powerful Spice Girl.
'The Queen specifically asked if we could somehow link together to create one monstrous unit - she told our management company that money is no object, she's got to see this happen,' Mel B said.
'I think what's going to happen is that we're going to start the show with me giving birth to the other girls on stage, and then consuming them all as the show goes on, until I am a 25 foot tall singing beast with the legs of Posh, the hair of Ginger, and the voice of Mel C. It's a bit radical, it's a bit out-there, but we're all looking forward to it.'
Mel B added that the giant Spice Girl 'will have the power of 40 men and its shriek will be heard across the nation.'
The Spice Girls have hired a firm of leading genetic designers to co-ordinate the creation of the behemoth Spice Girl, although a controversial previous attempt by the company to form the band Boyz 2 Men 2 Monster led to the destruction of downtown San Francisco and the loss of 472 lives in 2008.
The Metropolitan Police are believed to have assigned 10 helicopters and several dozen master marksmen to cover the concert, in case the terrible singing beast escapes from the stage and attempts to climb any of London's tallest buildings. Scotland Yard commissioner Bernard Hogan-Howe said: 'We have it on good intelligence that the Queen wants this creature to not only sing, but breathe fire. This could be the greatest threat to our country since Al Qaeda.'
Nicely surreal. 5*
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