A family in Berkshire was in ‘social crisis’ yesterday as the electricity supply was unexpectedly cut off for a whole day.’ It was awful’, commented mother of three, Sophie Havlard’. ‘I knew my family were in the house somewhere but we all usually just sit in our own rooms on the internet, watching tv or playing on the xbox. I knew I had to go and talk to them but I had forgotten how many rooms there are and whose room was whose. Normally if we need to ‘talk’ to each other we usually just update our statuses on FB, or as a last resort text each other with a msg’. It came as quite a shock to me to remember just how many other rooms there are in the house, apart from mine-I was quite short of breath with the effort’.
Sophie’s partner, Dave, took up the story. ‘I was pleasantly surprised to note that my partner actually has quite a nice face, as do the children-if I do look up from my laptop at any point all I usually see is just a glimpse of the top of their heads. Dave admitted to also being somewhat surprised at the size of his children. ’Last time I remember seeing them they looked a lot younger than they do now’ he observed, but he admitted he wasn’t sure the last time he and the children had actually been in the same room. ‘It may have been with the delivery of the xbox’, he remembered, ‘but we were all trying to get it out of the packaging at once; it was something of a frenzy, so we realised we needed one each. That was the last time I saw any of them, I think. To be honest, they do seem much fatter now, too’.
The emergency was ended when one of the children, who could not actually be identified by the parents, had enough power left in his mobile phone to ring the fire and rescue service, who led the family to safety. The childrens’ names have not been printed as they are still the subject of considerable speculation by the parents.