Underachieving middle manager Justin Snood, 48, today finally scaled Level 5 of Maslow's Hierarchy after having his post on David Cameron and Scott of the Antarctic selected for the home page of the prestigious news website, Newsbiscuit (www.newsbiscuit.co.uk).
Speaking to the world's press from his small cubicle on Level 26, he announced he had at last achieved Self Actualisation. "I've had Levels 1 and 2 covered for ages, and can usually manage Levels 3 and 4 for brief spurts, but until yesterday I felt I hadn't truly landed on Level 5."
Against a backdrop of faded purple fabric and among piles of unread documents and reports, his chair slowly squeaked as he explained his creative triumph. "I read on the BBC news website about that Norwegian PM flying to the South Pole to commemorate Roald Amundsen's feat. That reminded me of Captain Scott and that little Ladybird book my mum gave me when I was little. In a flash I saw a parallel with with Cameron and the EU veto and the words just wrote themselves".
Avoiding further questions about his views on self-referential parody, he raced down the corridor to a meeting for which he was already over 10 minutes late.