Recent news has emerged that groups of privately educated, well off, white individuals are exerting influence on politics behind the scenes.
Until now, the general public were blissfully happy in the knowledge that a group of Eton educated individuals, who all had assets of over £1m and thought an estate was somewhere to spend Christmas and shoot slow flying birds, were running the country. However, it actually appears that another group of privately educated, wealthy individuals, most of whom work in PR firms, are exerting influence behind the scenes.
"This is going to be a massive shock to the electorate." Said one expert. "The fact that another, entirely different, group of privately educated rich men, who are all getting on a bit, are actually calling the shots in the corridors of power, might be too much for some people to take."
Grainy undercover footage, which can make a conversation about the weather look like a drug dealing scene from The Wire, emerged of Timothy Collington Fortesque Smythe, the MD of a PR company, who's hobbies include Daily Mail reading, chav baiting and encouraging trade with lunatic African despots, boasting of his close links to power.
"Sometimes the government employ me to shift public opinion, but to be fair I do fuck all, then just charge them for an arbitrary figure that I've made up. Me and Dave go back a long way; we used to ride poor people around the streets of Windsor whilst at Eton. You probably shouldn't tell people that though."
Latest statistics show that when confronted with the news the majority of an already very downtrodden public 'couldn't give less of a fuck', as they assumed that this was the usual kind of bullshit that takes place in politics on a daily basis.