Nearly two thousand years after it was originally prophesied during the Sermon on the Mount, the Meek have finally inherited the Earth. Speculation has now been growing about what they will do with it, however, with many fearing that the Meek are generally too shy to ask for advice.
'Well, well, this is a turn up for the books,' said Raymond Muldowney, a mild-mannered deputy bank manager who had hitherto been best known for having the finest model railway collection on the Isle of Wight. 'Apparently I'm in charge of all metal and mineral deposits in southern Africa now. Goodness me.'
Muldowney admitted that he is more at ease with handing out hymn books at All Saints Church Shanklin than organising mining concessions or paying off militias. He is also unsure of who to appoint to middle management positions in Zaire's Copper Belt, given that it is also woe unto the rich, the strong, the lawyers, the Pharisees and anyone else who ever had anything to do with organising things.
'I do so hate to make a fuss,' Muldowney said. 'I tried asking those who hunger and thirst after righteousness, but they've been filled and are sleeping it off. The poor in spirit have all vanished - somewhere nice I hope - and the pure in heart are in a bit of daydream after getting the Kingdom of Heaven. Perhaps my wife Doreen could ask some of her friends at the bridge club?'
No other meek people could be contacted for comment, as they were all hiding under a table in the back room when reporters knockeda at their front door. Some cynical observers have argued that they have only been given their inheritance now because of the mess left over by the previous regime.
'It's definitely woe unto us,' said City investment banker Peregrine Stockdale. 'Rich, greedy, deceitful ... yup, you got us bang to rights. And now I'm only getting 50% of my annual bonus and my girlfriend won't let me play the rusty French horn on her until she gets another pair of gold shoes. Well let the Meek sort this bloody mess out, they probably only got given it because they are too weak to refuse.'
