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toiletries for tramps

(15 posts) (13 voices)

Started 1 year ago by waylandsmithy
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waylandsmithy

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Bought this on a '2 for 1' in Sainsburys. When I got home, noticed it offers '72 hour protection'.

So this is a niche product for the sort of person who doesn't wash for 3 days, but does spend money on toiletries. At last, someone is listening to my needs.

Posted 1 year ago #
Perks

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Just need a toothpaste that keeps your breath mouth 'fresh for 3 days' and you have a glastonbury wash bag. Where will it stop!

Posted 1 year ago #
Scroat

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I'm a bit pissed, and it's been a really emotionally draining day for various reasons, but I really did laugh out loudly at this. All it needs is something anti-fungal to make it complete.

Thanks you for cheering me up Smudger.

Posted 1 year ago #
waylandsmithy

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Scroat, it's a pleasure! I'm up for not wiping properly for 48 hours, then writing a complaint letter to their customer relations department.

Posted 1 year ago #
FlashArry

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Surely a personal visit would be more productive ?

Posted 1 year ago #
waylandsmithy

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That is genius.

Posted 1 year ago #
dvo4fun

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i) "Excuse me Mr Smithers, there's a Mr Wayland in reception asking to see a representative from Customer Service. No, he hasn't got an appointment but he's carrying a can of the 72-hour's and smells like a polecat."

ii) "Can't be arsed to wash this weekend? Then try our new xtreme 72hour protection. Clubbing on Friday, footer with the lads on Saturday afternoon, out on the lash Saturday night, sleep in until Sunday evening, then tone up on the rowing machine in the evening. And still be fresh and sweet for work on Monday! Right Guard - for men who don't have to try too hard."

iii) "Take two cans into the shower? Not me I don't even go into the shower."

iv) Time for bed. I'll have a shower in the morning. Not sure which morning yet though.

Posted 1 year ago #
The All New Jeni B

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I bet it sells really well in France.

Posted 1 year ago #
Chuts

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It's for airline passengers.

Posted 1 year ago #
bonjonelson

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Ha. If only it was compulsory.

Posted 1 year ago #
John Ffitch-Rucker

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72 hours protection? That’s nothing - aound this way ‘Crusher’ Morgan and his boys offer a whole weeks protection for just £200.00.

Posted 1 year ago #
Son of Barnabas

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Oh no! I got confused in the chemists and thought the "72 hour protection" referred to the Durex I was buying. I thought it was a bit optimistic that it could last for 24 "goes".

Posted 1 year ago #
antharrison

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I think the assumption that 72H = 72 hours may be incorrect.

I suspect that it protects you against unprovoked attacks from giant horses with a height of 72 hands or more.

It's "Life's too short night" BTW.

Posted 1 year ago #
Gerontius

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Xtreme Protection Against Wetness....think I'll stick with the incontinence pads

Posted 1 year ago #
button

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I noted in the shower this morning that my shaving foam offers 3 x triple protection. I make that 9 'protections'. Maybe I should find out what they are. All I'm really after is protection from cutting myslef when shaving, but if they're throwing in mortgage protection as well then I'm happy to accept it.

Posted 1 year ago #

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