Scotland Yard has released a statement this morning stating their huge disappointment over the student protests. Over 4000 police officers were present yesterday with authority to deploy 'baton rounds' if necessary. However, the forces were distinctely underwhelmed on the day and have been accused of trying to provoke the protesters.
One police officer was seen leaving a banana skin clearly in the path of protest, whilst some went undercover to spread rumours of 'student fees being used as bonuses for bankers and Tory ministers'.
Many spectators on the day claim the protesters lost steam when they were lured away by various bars displaying 'Happy Hour Prices' signs and offers of a 'Free shot with every drink'. One protester commented "honestly, I'm so skint right now, so when you see prices like that you just have to go for it. We ended up having such a laugh."
Chief of Scotland Yard, Bernard Hogan-Howe, said earlier "I think it's a little unfair of the protesters to promise so much fight and let us down on the day. We put a lot of thought into the day and now have a battery of rubber bullets we'll need to store somewhere".
It is not yet confirmed what happened to the surplus horses required for the operation, but it is likely they have all been brutally put down.
The lack of excitement has also led to the cancellation of the long anticipated "Protests 2011" DVD, which, drawing on 'hilarious' footage from Dale Farm and other such action, was hotly billed as the must-have Christmas gift for friends who you don't know to well.