The owners of the Bullingdon Club brand, the secretive yet widely known Bilderberg Group, today announced plans to massively increase the clubs footprint by franchising the operation into every major town in the UK over the next few years.
The groups PR agent Hilaire Smythe-Smithson explained that the concept behind the Bullingdon Club had already gained acceptance in the UK, "You only have to go into any town centre on a Saturday night to see young people getting blindly drunk, taking drugs and committing acts of vandalism". He went on to add that the Bullingdon Club was well placed to capitalise on this.
Mr. Smythe-Smithson then stated that the concept needed to be tweaked in order to gain the market share it believed was possible "We may have to swap the Chateaubriand for kebabs and the Bollinger for WKD".
When challenged by an unknown portly man with a blonde wig that the plan was selling out something that made Britain great, Mr. Smythe-Smithson just laughed and threw a canapé directly into his face, smashed a window with a chair and wrote a large cheque before leaving.