Despite heroically diving in front of a lorry to save an old lady from being run over, Good samaritan and local charity worker Dave Hitchens was somehow, still an arsehole, it emerged last night.
Against all the oods and notwithstanding his outstanding act of selfless bravery in broad daylight, passers by explained that although they admired his courage, they were nonetheless left with a distinct sensation that Dave, 33 was a "class A Arsehole".
"It was like - yeah you've saved the old lady but there's just something about you I don't like" said one eyewitness "and to be honest that was the lasting impression I got from him".
Friends and acquaintances were also inexplicably downbeat about Dave's general character:
"I don't know what it is about Dave" said one acquaintance - "it's like - he's a really loving and giving person and I know he's given a lot of time and money towards helping other people and helping to cure diseases and manning lifeboats and rescuing cats, but somehow I still just want to punch him in the face".
Another peer commented: "yeah Dave just tries too hard - rescuing a drowning kitten one week, giving blood the next - it's like - dude...not cool".
Dave, who took a year of unpaid leave recently to use his PhD in biochemistry to help scientists find a cure for cancer, was reportedly "gutted" last night to be so ill-thought of by his next of kin and peers.
"One tries to give of oneself" he remarked, modestly looking at the floor, "and to help those less fortunate than ourselves - and of course one never expects the acclaim of one's peers."
The old lady in question, dusting herself down at the side of the road which, had it not been for Dave, she would undoubtedly have been crushed into a bloody pulp onto, commented: "Well I'm grateful for what he did but when he introduced himself afterwards and offered to call me a cab I just thought - I'm so glad you're not my son".
Dave was asked for further comment but explained that he was busy removing a thorn from a puppy's paw and would be late for his session at Childline if he was further delayed.
